He and She: Just Another Day of the Weak

She: “Today is Wednesday, correct?”

He: “All day.”

She: “Wed-nes-day?”

He: “Same rules of pronunciation used to say ‘Worcester’.”

She: What rules?”

He: “Don’t get me started. The names of the days of the week have never made any sense. Why should they start now?”

She: “So I can pronounce them?”

He: “I think we can pronounce them ‘weird’. No logic to them whatsoever. For example, if you’re going to have a Whensday, why isn’t the next day Howsday? Or Wheresday?”

She: “Or Whatsday …”

He: “Well, that would be the most powerful day of the week, at least.”

She: “Speaking of strong, with all the Windsdays we’ve had lately, isn’t it time we had a Stillday?”

He: “Catch Piglet on the way by, won’t you, Pooh? Your Stillday might get the moonshiners in trouble, thinking that, on Stillday, they’re legal.”

She: “None of them left. They’re all growing cannabis now.”

He: “For the win?”

She: “On Winsday. But if you’re going to have Winsdays, you’re going to have to have Losedays too, and we’ve already got enough of them, thank you very much.”

He: “Word. Murphy needs no invitations, not interested in giving him any. I’d suggest sending him to Germany, have him make trouble there and leave us alone. but the Germans are too sensible, even with the Ukraine mess on their doorstep, and Murphy would probably come flying back here disappointed and angry. Not good.”

She: “The Germans are sensible?”

He: “They call this day of the week Midweek Day. For the win.”

She: “How boring!

He: “And they care how? Speaking of how, how’d we get onto this topic anyway?”

She: “So I can take my pills!

He: “You’re supposed to be pay …

She: “Stop right there! The pills are for my hard muscles.

He: “[…] Some people would pay good money to get those.”

She: “So am I! On physicians and physical therapists to get them to relax!

He: “Hm. This doesn’t sound like a medical problem. More like an HR problem. Labor negotiations to break the tension.”

She: “Um …”

He: “Your muscles have permanent jobs?”

She: “Of course they do! They’re mine!

He: “Doesn’t sound like they think so. They’re behaving like they’re panicked about job security, never mind wages, benefits, working conditions. Especially after you hired that efficiency expert, who calls herself a physical therapist. They think they’re contract labor, and are acting accordingly.”

She: “[…] I’m going to bite you!”

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1 Response to He and She: Just Another Day of the Weak

  1. Quilly says:

    Today is Friday and I’m preparing the hot oil. Come on home so I can cook your goose.

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