She: “I’m so glad you’re home!”
He: “I’m glad to be home too. But I wasn’t on the road all that long. Only two weeks.”
She: “Precisely!!”
He: “Um … whut?”
She: “Have you got any idea what it’s like to be just sitting here, knowing you’re on that road and at any moment you could get run over? For two whole weeks!?!”
He: “Not that kind of road …”
She: “Says you. I’ve had pavement burns. They’re ugly and they hurt. So … breakfast?”
He: “Right. Two weeks away and suddenly I look like Wreck-it Ralph?
She: “Um … whut?”
He: “I’d really rather not have to try and break anything right now. Fast or slow, away or down. After all this going places and doing things, I was hoping to sit down, relax, and not have to break a sweat.”
She: “No sweating at the breakfast table. It’s rude.”
He: “Hm. Not a lot of peeps get to stay Hawaiʻi if that’s the rule.”
She: “If they stay, they maybe go hungry. Which, if you’re not, I am! I was, maybe, going to make waffles.”
He: “Great idea! Stop waffling!”
She: “Ay-ia? Which is it? Do you want some or not?”
He: “Yes! Of course I want some!”
She: “Then why’d you tell me to stop making them?!?”
He: […] “Did you miss me?”
She: “Terribly.”
He: “Aw …”
She: “But now you’re close enough to hit! I’d start being more careful if I was you …!”