Dude and Dude Get Real

“[…] uh, dude?”

“Whut?”

“Do I wanna know whut yer tryin’ ta feed me here?”

“Fish?”

Inna bread bag? That tale’s kinda fishy.”

“So would tha head an’ tha rest a it. Now tell me yer grateful it ain’t.”

“Grateful fer whut? That I ain’t realin’ in tha bread fer my sandwich?”

“I’d like ta see ya try ta make that sandwich wit’ bread made from imaginary ingredients, dude.”

“That would be dope, dude.”

“In bread? I thought that wuz supposed ta be fer brownies.”

“It’s a real ingredient, dude. So is, like, maybe, concrete. Makes fer a real dense loaf, ya feel me? Could kinda be hard on tha teeth.”

“Dunno whut’s crustier, dude. Tha bread, ‘r you.”

“Mebbe I’m just gettin’ kinda tired a gettin’ fed a line, yeah?’

“Whatta ya wanna get fed, dude? Food? Whassamatta you? Didya buy tha bread ‘r didn’t ya?”

“[…]”

“So ya wuzn’t watchin’ out fer tha hook, yeah?”

Dammit, dude …!”

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