With abject apologies to Danny Kortchmar and Don Henley.
Docs ‘re beggin’ for more ventilators
To put in intensive care,
And all they want to do’s unmask, mask,
The curves refuse to flatten, catchin’ people unaware,
And all they want to do’s unmask!
Got a brother drinkin’ quinine, got a sister drinkin’ bleach,
And all they want to do’s unmask, mask,
Daddy’s sittin’ in the hoosegow for quarantinin’ on the beach,
And all they want to do’s unmask.
Got fake backgrounds on their Zoom screens so that neighbors cannot pry,
And all they want to do’s unmask, mask,
Got whacked-out friends of Jesus claimin’ they ain’t gonna die,
And all they want to do is
All they want to do’s umask!
And take a chance
They can’t smell the buzz
From the virus cuz,
They want a haircut
And not a pay cut,
All they want to do is,
All they want to do’s unmask!
We’ve learned how to make a necktie from a policeman’s shoe,
And all they want to do’s unmask, mask,
That all the history you need to know is written on a statue,
And all they want to do’s unmask!
Somehow no one ever seems to get the employment numbers right,
And all they want to do’s unmask, mask,
And the persons who know what to do are kept strictly out of sight,
‘Cause all they want to do is,
All they want to do’s unmask!
And take a chance!
Well the President’s been tweetin’ that it’s just another cold,
It’s just the thing to have around if you’re sweatin’ gettin’ old,
Or if you’re ‘fraid of travelin’. If they ever fly again,
Good luck gettin’ on a plane
‘Cause all they want to do’s unmask!
And take a chance!
They can’t smell the buzz
From the virus cuz,
They want a haircut
And not a pay cut,
All they want to do is,
All they want to do’s unmask!