He and She: Once Upon A Telecommute

She: “Come to lunch!”

He: “OK …”

She: “… um … are you working?”

He: “Yes.”

She: “Well, you could have told me that you were too busy to stop for lunch right now.”

He: “I could have, but I didn’t. No point in putting lunch off, but I also don’t wish to break my train of thought.”

She: “So instead, you’re going to let your train roll right over me!”

He: “Bah. You know that’s not how I roll.”

She: “Prove it. What’s so important that you can’t break for lunch and talk to me?”

He: “Levo-asparagine.”

She: ” … uh, whut?”

He: “Levo-asparagine. It’s an amino acid.”

She: “Right. I thought you said ‘levitate asparagus’. I don’t know how to levitate asparagus.”

He: “They found the amino acid in asparagus. So they called it asparagine. And …

She: “Never heard of Aspara Jeans.”

He: “[…] And it comes in two flavors, left and right.”

She: “Left and right aren’t flavors!”

He: “Why not? Up and down are. So are charm and strange.”

She: “Flavors of what?”

He: Quarks.”

She: “Quirks?”

He:Quarks. Elementalpartically, my dear Watson.”

She: “Too bad. Because ‘quirks’ would have fit so nicely. Have I told you lately that you scientists are weird?”

He: “Well, if the physicists can talk about their things having flavors, then so can I talk about my things having flavors. And you care. Really.”

She: “Yes?”

He: “Yes. Because the ‘left’ flavors make up all the proteins in your body. The ‘right’ flavors will kill you.”

She: “So how can anyone be right-handed and live?”

He: “Don’t go there. Just. Don’t. Go. There.”

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