Dude and Dude Help With Quilly's Stats

“So we’re supposed to talk about the Quillster, dude?”

“Yeah, dude.”

“So she’ll get more readers?”

“That’s the idea.”

“So what’s she been doin’ lately?”

Sellin’ stuff, dude. Where’ve you been?”

“Like, what?”

“Like, cosmetics.”

“They have ticks in space?!?

“Of course they do, dude. They bite space cadets. Which answers that question.”

“What’s this stuff good for?”

“To make you beautiful, dude. Well, OK, maybe not you. Take mascara, for instance.”

“Oh yeah, that’s right. It’s almost Labor Day. The store’s ‘ve gotta get that stuff out there. Along with the Christmas stuff.”


“I understand the Dick Cheney is still a top seller.”

What’re you talkin’ about??

Scary masks, dude. Isn’t that what you said?

“Not scary masks, dude! Mascara!

Exactly! Listen, dude, does this ‘cosmetics‘ stuff include perfume?

“Aha. Light dawns on Marblehead.”

“And deodorant?

“Get a case, dude.”

“After you, dude. But doesn’t this mean Quilly’s gonna have to be careful?


“When she takes down what people want to buy and stuff. You know how she sometimes gets all discombobulated when she’s tryin’ to do too many things at once. Somebody tries to get a whole bunch of scented stuff, along with this and that and somethin’ else too, and in tryin’ to get it all down the Q gets flummoxed and says ‘Thank you for your odor‘, well, she’s goin’ to lose customers, that’s all I’m sayin’.”

“Riiight, dude. And this is supposed to help with Quilly’s stats how?

“She didn’t say which direction, dude.”

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0 Responses to Dude and Dude Help With Quilly's Stats

  1. Thom says:

    ROFLMAO!!! Oh the dudes LOL

    • Quilly says:

      Thom, they are a joy, aren’t they? Pfft.

      • Thom says:

        As much joy as taking a table spoon of Castor Oil LOL

        • Amoeba says:

          I’ll take that!”

          “You will, dude? Yech!

          “What yech, dude? You got somethin’ ‘gainst seafood?”

          “What the hell does …?”

          “You can do as you like, dude, but I’m goin’ fishin’. That oil oughta lube my reel right up slick. Then I can cast my bait halfway to Honolulu if I want.”

          “Why Honolulu, dude? Better music?”

          “Music …?”

          “Well, you’re goin’ after tuner fish, ain’t ya?”

  2. “Thank you for your odor!” Too funny.

    Just don’t be leaving any of that perfume in a hot car!

  3. Anna says:

    QUILLY: oh that was funny – Not scary masks, dude! Mascara!
    Anna 🙂

    • Quilly says:

      Thanks, Anna, but that wasn’t me. It was my mate. Sometimes he and his imaginary friends like to hang out here.

      • Amoeba says:

        “How many times we gotta go through this, dude? I’m not imaginary!”

        “Too right, dude. The next glimpse of an imagination I get from you will be the first. Besides, I thought you were goin’ fishin’.”

        “What does that have to do with …?”

        “So go, already. Make that cast to Honolulu, and start draggin’ that bait back. Then you’ll be reel.”

  4. polona says:

    ticks in space… that henson guy must be turning in his grave for not thinking of that
    (then again, maybe not)

  5. kcinnova says:

    “Thank you for your odor” Bwahahahaha!

    By the way, I really have liked the bug repellent towelettes.

  6. DUDE! That was awesome! 🙂

    • Quilly says:

      Thena — laughing at Amoeba’s imaginary friends gives them delusions of substance.

      • Amoeba says:

        “She talkin’ ’bout substances, dude?”

        “Yeah, dude. And delusions. Delusions of substance. Not delusions from substances. So put your nickel back in your pocket.”


  7. Nessa says:

    This was so funny and illustrates that any publicity is good publicity. 🙂

  8. Melli says:

    OY!!! ROFL! I certainly hope this helps … hahahahaha…

  9. Oh, my goodness. So many witty puns here! I can’t stop laughing.