Dude & Dude Time Capsules: Week 1

The Dudes, with their abject failure of a literary agent, O Ceallaigh (aka OC and The Amoeba), first descended onto the blogosphere from a rented room in Berkeley, California on New Year’s Day in 2006. They’ve moved from California to Maine to Washington to Hawaii to Washington again to Hawaii again (where they’ve finally managed to stay put, for now anyway), picking up a Quilly along the way. They’ve stayed on the blogosphere (on four different sites, two of which have since vanished), while the thing that was the blogosphere in 2006 moved to Facebook to Youtube to Twitter to Instagram to Tiktok. And a lot of, um, stuff has gone down. O Ceallaigh thought it might amuse someone out there to see just what kind of stuff has gone down over the last fifteen years, and how it looked at the time to OC and the Dudes and their gaggle of weird buddies.


One year ago this week: The Dude and Dude 45 In Rear View

Two years ago: Reg and Syd: That Sucking Sound Is Coming From the Cloud

Five years ago: Amoeba’s Lorica: Indistinguishable From Magic

Ten years ago: TSA Jack: Tray Chic

Fifteen years ago: Of Long Drops, Land Crabs, and the Prerequisites For a Life in Science

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Dude and Dude: Mister 22

“Earth ta Dude!”

“I’ve taken my protein pills!”

“So’s ya c’n be more‘ve a pill than ya wuz b’fore? As if ya wuzn’t odd enuff a’ready. But it’s just ’bout midnight, 2021’s ’bout done. If’n ya wanna see tha ball drop, ya’d better get out here, like, fast!

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll get there when I get there, dig?”

“Suit yerself. 5 .. 4 .. 3 .. 2 .. what tha?!?”

Happy Nude Year, dude!”

“Du-UUUUUDE! This wuz not whut I meant by ‘ball drop’!!”

“Ya told me ta suit myself!”

“I liked yer otha birthday suit betta, which ain’t sayin’ much. Dude, this gag wasn’t funny in 2011, an’ ya ain’t no more fun ta look at now than ya wuz then, ya feel me? Ya might spit tha rose out an’ stick a apple in yer mouth. At least that’d fit yer body shape, Porky. Better still, get some clothes on.”

Dammit, dude, when’re we gonna start havin’ fun at New Years? 2020 wuz a dead loss, an’ 2021 took one look at 2020 an’ said hold my beer, just like we wuz afraid of!”

“Don’ hold yer breath, dude. From tha looks a things, 2022 gonna be handin’ beers ta both 2021 an’ 2020, an if’n at this time next year we’s both still alive an’ not wearin’ barrels, we c’n be doin’ happy dances.”

Naked?

“Not if’n ya know what’s good fer ya, dude! Now git, yer freakin’ me out!”

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Rebel Music (The Dude and Dude 2021 Year in Rear View)

Click/tap on dates to read the posts associated with each caption.


31 December 2020: The Dudes realize, to their horror, that the 21st century is now of legal drinking age. “Just tellin’ ya whut I’m most afraid a, dude.” “Wuzzat?” “That 2021’s gonna take one look at 2020 an’ say ‘hold my beer’, yeah?”

6 January 2021:

15 January: In which a ‘foreign object’ is defined on the basis of its point of application, not its place of origin.

20 January: The inauguration of President Joe Bidentime Biden proceeds without incident. It is unknown whether any of Mr Biden’s tens of thousands of bodyguards was named Betty.

23 January: China decides to follow the science of climate change through to its logical conclusion, and Wayne is left to tell the tale. Maybe.

21 February: “How can you build barnyard diversity with an attitude like that?”, the rat asked. “How can you build trust? And equal treatment among animals?” “Like you’ve never made off with one of their eggs?”, the pig snorted. “Shut. Up.”, the rat replied.

1 March: When Authority prohibits a prohibition, it becomes a requirement. He and She try to figure out how to avoid getting thrown out of the shopping mall as a result.

21 March: The Dudes try to cook something. And fail.

2 May: A boy is initiated into his world’s understanding of medicine and education … and, what’s left of these things from before his time.

13 May: The CDC announces that fully vaccinated USA citizens can stop wearing masks in outdoor settings. The announcement is greeted with shouts of “The end of the COVID crisis is near” and “Life is starting to return to normal” – while, in India, cases are at record high levels due to the newly-recognized Delta variant of SARS-CoV-2.

23 May:Dreams come true. If they did not, nature would not incite us to have them.” Or, would incite those who have been victimized by dreams to ban them.

20 June: People in the USA finally get to go shopping, only to find that there’s nothing in the shops. And they’re no happier about doing what needs to be done about it than their forebears, confronting a similar situation, during World War 2.

24 June: The Champlain Towers South condominium in Surfside, Florida, collapses abruptly at 1:25 AM EDT.

26 June: The Netherlands lifts all COVID restrictions.

27 June: Where He and She go one, He and She go all.

14 July: The Netherlands puts all the COVID restrictions back, after cases abruptly spike to near-record levels. As anticipated. The rest of the world, and Hawai‘i in particular, will soon follow suit. The news from The Netherlands includes reports of increasing numbers of COVID cases among the vaccinated.

26 July: The Amoeba explores the all-encompassing world of fake news masquerading as quotations from famous people, and sees a connection between this world and condominiums that go ‘thump’ in the night.

8 August: Leonard, Carla, and William start their day in a world that has taken the minimum authoritative action needed to combat climate change for real.

14 August: The Dudes complain about the naming conventions for SARS-CoV-2 variants. (And this is before they had to deal with Omicron.)

15 August: Kabul, the capital of Afghanistan, falls to the Taliban. The USA Secretary of State proclaims This is not Saigon. No – because desperate refugees fell from the landing gear of C-17 Globemaster III transport jets instead of CH-46 and CH-53 helicopters. And, because there’s not much to separate the Taliban from the dominant elements of USA society.

25 September: The Netherlands relaxes most of the COVID restrictions that it imposed in July.

26 September: Cliff and Miranda have survived the catastrophic, world-ending “Seppukuvirus” plague. So far.

30 September: As predicted, Lord Bidentime’s President Biden’s ambitious legislative agenda is dismantled under the competing pressures ripping apart his disunited coalition, and his collapsed approval ratings post-Afghanistan, while Republicans under the un-incarcerated leadership of the Cheeto Mussolini confidently anticipate their ascendancy in both houses of Congress in 2023.

23 October: He and She discuss the possibility that a relationship might be too big for the characters, in the book that She is writing, to handle.

7 November: The Amoeba decides that “technology” is far too negative a word to use for advances that have made it easier to make music … and poison the atmosphere …

13 December: He and She get pwned.

19 December: The Netherlands imposes a total COVID lockdown, in response to record numbers of COVID cases, driven by the Omicron variant. As anticipated, the conditions predisposing to such spikes having changed little since July. Worldwide, after two years of COVID thrashing, daily new case numbers reached their highest levels ever, as reported on 26 December. In Hawai‘i, reported case numbers on 26 December obliterated the prior daily new case record by 24%, with current projections calling for 4,000 new cases daily in early 2022. Honolulu mayor Blangiardi rejected imposing new restrictions, saying that “we can’t afford it” and calling on Hawai‘i citizens to “make responsible choices“.

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