It is written, there shall be no human habitation that is exempt from possession by a cat, unless a dog is present and unapproachable; and if a suitable habitation be without a cat, one shall promptly be supplied.
It’s been eighteen months since the local community cat, known to some neighbors as Mr. O’Malley, started to lay claim to the house that He and She occupy. The claim is now firmly established. Gifts have been exchanged, and the matter of appropriate victuals and the timing of their delivery has been settled to the satisfaction (for now) of Management. The new proprietor has even tolerated being called “Fluffybutt”, and (somewhat more testily) the application of flea collars.
The staff are working up the nerve to present their case for wages and retirement benefits.
You are very lucky humans to have been employed by this cat.