Dude and Dude: Picking Up The Pieces (Maybe)



“Yeah, I’ll give ya what. Like, what is all this s … don’t you touch me!”

“Ya keep tellin’ me ta keep it clean, dude. Wit’ yer paws all over my face. Dish it out but y’can’t take it, huh?”

“Funny y’should mention ‘keepin’ it clean’, dude. Ya wouldn’t haveta worry ’bout my language if I didn’t haveta worry ’bout all this … this … stuff on the floor here. Ya tryin’ ta kill a dude or somethin’??”

“I’m jus’ doin’ what the lady said, dude!”

What lady?”

“Friend a OC’s.”

“‘K, that answers the next questions.”


“What chick would bother wit’ the likes a you, and why. So wha’d she say?”

“I got it here, dude … but if that’s the way ya think ’bout her …”

“Yeah, yeah. Gimme.”

“So I picked up this old printer at a yard sale, cheap, an’ I thought if I just stuck in a USB connector, I c’ld get it to talk to my PC, an’ maybe even print from the cloud or somethin’. But I couldn’t figure out how ta hook the USB to the board, an’ while I was pokin’ things tryin’ to find that out, I discovered there were issues wit’ the power supply …”

“An’ so ya gave up.”

“Dude. I moved on. Like it says there.”

“So other dudes c’n trip over what ya left lyin’ around an’ break their necks! Who the hell ya think’s gonna come clean up after ya? The Mario brothers? Does the word ‘recyclin’ mean nothin’ to ya?”

“But that’s the whole point, dude! Yer saposed ta break the cycle so’s ya c’n get out a worryin’ ’bout stuff so much. Y’don’t need toes anyhow. B’sides. Ya tried recyclin’ computer parts lately?”

“Throw it in the trash, then.”

“They’ll throw it right back, dude. That stuff ain’t goin’ in no landfill.”

“So what’re ya supposed to do wit’ it, then?”

“Like I keep tellin’ ya, dude! Leave it an’ move on!

Move is right, dude. Like, move out!

“Ya ain’t makin’ the rent noplace else, dude!”

“Same as you, dude!”

“Which means …”

“Yeah, yeah. Move on. Willya at least get the wreckage outa the middle a the kitchen?

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