“Hi, Jack!”
“How many times …?”
“Yeah, yeah. I see you been lookin’ after our security again. Nice one!”
“That so? What, José, can you see?”
“Alrightalright, touché. You never miss a trick, do you? Since so many of your tricks wind up in our dividend checks, I suppose I can forgive you. Like these new tray liners, the ones with the advertisin’ on ’em. Brilliant!”
“Just followin’ basic principles, José. ‘Put your ads where the catt… er, the customers must see ’em.’ An’ ya gotta see where yer putting’ yer stuff so’s it can go through the scanner. Purse, laptop, keycase, belt, shoes, jockstrap …”
“Ewww. I see enough o’ them even before the hombres step into the body scanner. Amazin’ how many guys don’t buy pants that fit no more. Ain’t enough pretty girls in the world either, y’know that?”
“Oh, I dunno, amigo. I find enough to suit me. Ya just gotta know where to look. And how.”
“Reckon you do, Jack. Reckon you do.”
The best thing about taking Amtrak home was not worrying over what was in which pocket.
Or getting it back after it left the pocket …