Dude and Dude: Christmas Lullabye-bye

“OK, dude, I don’t get it.”

“Not unless y’pay fer it, dude.”

“Way ta tell me I ain’t gettin’ no Christmas present from you, dude!

“Ay. Ya got me. What else y’want?”

“More’n you c’n afford. Obviously.”

“Y’mean, like yakisoba ‘stead o’ ramen?”

“Yep. That’s ’bout what I thought.”

“So what else you ain’t gettin’ ‘sides a free meal offa me?”

“Y’been listenin’ to this Christmas music?”

“Yeah, well, it ain’t like I gotta try.”

“An’ it’s all makin’ out like this Jesus dude is all that.”

“Well, it is his birthday.”

“Says who?”

“Says … dude, just don’t go there, ‘k?”

“Well, whatever it is, y’d think the dude would be wantin’ t’party!

“Wouldn’t you?

So how come all these songs are tryin’ t’put the baby to sleep?

“Dude.”

“Dude?”

“It’s real simple, dude.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. When Jesus is sleepin’, he ain’t lecturin’!

“Huh?”

“Huh. Y’ever actually read this guy?”

“Um, no.”

“Dude’s got a tongue like a razor. How many times somebody call you a dimwit ‘fore yer tellin’ him ‘give it a rest already’!”

“Like, wow.”

“An’ the dude ain’t even outa the manger yet. O’ course Mary’s gonna try ta get the kid ta sleep. So she can get a bit o’ rest herself! It ain’t like she’s gonna get much. Y’got any idea what happens when the Son o’ God has a temper tantrum?!?

“Um … the seein’ go blind an’ the walkers go lame?”

“Dude.”

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